This has been running for a month now so I am practically running on empty and waiting for April 11 to be over. April 11 is the day the official list of graduating students gets approved--and I've got a bunch of students in this list. I'm just not sure who gets to make it but had to be sure who were not. A month ago, I've had to coldly deal with breaking the news with one student who happens to be the son of a UPOU staff. This came after the fact that I had to email another parent to practically say we cannot accept his daughter into the program. Then there's screening other students and I had to put my foot down on a few ones we cannot accept. An appeal came but I had to stand my ground. I got through all those thinking like I can be so good as some kind of executioner--it's all part of the job. I played the role really well until this week, I could no longer keep myself together. It took 8-10 students to make this happen. Just when I thought I'm seeing their final grades coming in and students getting a clean record, I could not believe that there were names and faces getting a grade of 4.0=conditional. And of course, I had to inform them right away to schedule their removal exams. A 4.0 can become a 3.0 or a 5.0=scrapped from the list. And yes, by this time, I took this to heart. Yes it is hard to accept that despite all our efforts at the Faculty of Education, a few one will not be able to make it come graduation time. I wonder, was there a way I could have shielded myself? Is there a better way to just behave like a robot and deliver the news as news and not feel anything at all?
One may say, feelings can be conditioned; our reactions are results of how we are trained to behave in a certain way in our social environments. I don't know if I can buy that. At this point, I'll buy anything to keep me alive until April 11.
Good thing, blogging is practically free as I don't really need somebody to listen and solve this. I will simply expect that everyschoolyear, the months of Feb-March=bring it on!
One may say, feelings can be conditioned; our reactions are results of how we are trained to behave in a certain way in our social environments. I don't know if I can buy that. At this point, I'll buy anything to keep me alive until April 11.
Good thing, blogging is practically free as I don't really need somebody to listen and solve this. I will simply expect that everyschoolyear, the months of Feb-March=bring it on!
