The Essence of Bukas Palad

Last 2014, I decided that I simply cannot escape the idea of God's presence in my life because  it is in fact true that once you are a child of God, you are always a child of God not because of who we are but because of who he is....now if only I matured in the Christian faith in some way I wouldn't even have to be doing that search at this time of my life. It seems the journey has been quite different in my case.

And so year 2015 was spent mostly asking: how else I could have done better, or how else to stop myself from getting angry, getting sad due to unmet expectations of people you try to help or any kind of change you'd like to happen, how else I could have said things only to be met with either antagonism, closemindedness, ignorance or arrogance.  Exasperation has left me with more questions: is there anything good that will come out of this? And the answer is yes, if only I simply let go and let God. I almost missed the point.

And so I end year 2015 with hope and humility.  These people and events to my mind both have given pain and pleasure but all for a good reason and that is for me to see that I will never lose hope on people for as long as I live. I WILL simply have to try to see the best if not learn to forgive people for who they are for who I am but equally prone to human error. There are things I can no longer control or change or perhaps this is me saying the choice is not really up to me and therefore it should be ok.

What's the Big-H deal...?

If there's one thing I loved about the way we did things at TBA for this year's In service, IT is this: we got ourselves curious and  freed our minds through a great idea of the Big History Project. I said to DoF.."Funny how you manage to turn things upside down.." Every time there's a 'hard line' being drawn by the what we perceive to be as what is being asked of us by IB (when actually it isn't), she does something to turn it around. Like a driver on bus, she makes kabig, major major, just when we thought we have arrived at our destination. Slight confusion seems to me more like a brain adventure-- and watta  good brain exercise. And in Mailin's gifted way, she simply does this instinctively and smoothly, and we simply have to enjoy this ride, and just trust ourselves that we will get somewhere. After all, she wasn't named "Dyosa" by Wordlab fans for nothing. 

After having gone through IBO PYP, and getting out to test practices in my own school, and coming back, but this time at IBO MYP-DP, I saw how quickly I can buy into IB prescriptions, especially at the DP level where the pressure to deliver is much greater due to looming IAs and Paper formats, which though make sense, can sometimes make one's teaching and learning quite predictable, and yes, to some extent test driven for college preps. Yes, there's a side to my brain that works that way and then it sometime battles with how I think about my MYP Philo where I can practically play around, but within the boundaries of Criterion A, B, C and D. 

Teaching during my first year @TBA is  somekind of MYP vs DP battle, only to find out that if in fact I do conceptual teaching and inquiry at the MYP level, it should naturally connect to DP, and I should no longer worry whether students do in fact think conceptually because they will. And if they don't, the fallback would be the ATL's. Now for this 2nd schoolyear, I started my In service with that kept safely in my brain. Then comes this Big History Project!!! Unsettling but in an exciting way =) because now I question what I have safely arrived at ergo unsettling.  Exciting because like wowwwh, may I have a Philippine Big History project?! But then hellow Aleta, back to earth, start with small steps and you'll get somewhere somehow. It doesn't have to be here and now @TBA.

So this year will be sandbox mode for me to witness how teachers will make it happen and own it. This time, I will try to immerse differently and need not be in the thick of it, but I'll be a bystander to see how DoF, and ALL the willing teachers make something out of it.

But how did we chance upon this BIGGIE anyways. Thanks to technology--which keep us connected 24/7, 365 days a year. Mailin goes, it came to her inbox through an email sent by Mr Oshima, Alexis' dad. Mailin didn't look much into it back then. Then finally she did navigate it...then she learned Alexis was pretty excited about it (and such an interesting presence she can be, esp during health check ups). 

"This is Alexis' idea", Mai says. So, BOOM=there you go...another gifted teacher is around. This should be FUNNN. Suuuuweeet.

Being Human: 3 Lessons=1 New Formula

I remember saying to a dear co-teacher these days: God puts you in workplaces for a reason--and that is to learn something and be a better person than where you are now. It's the same thing I said to a fave colleague of mine at UPOU whenever he and I wondered about an older fellow who at his age, is still moving from one workplace to another perhaps because he is so full of himself and no longer capable of learning from others. He will always put the blame on others and never take responsibility for his actions at his age.

I do not think I am that sort nor do I even want to start to be that way and so I take time to reflect.
So what am I learning at this new workplace and why do I have to make the most of out it while Im still here?

Work has always been about seeing my experiments in education come to life--whether in a grade school, a university, online, face2face or blended. Then much later on, the challenge was to put these experiments into writing to share to the world as a solid contribution called research and publication. So, ok...I have done  all of those and proud in fact to have done things I never even thought of doing when I was an adolescent, in the midst of Ninoy Aquino's death, simply coming around to decide on becoming a teacher in order to do my part to work for better education for Filipinos.

Looking back, all my formulas succeeded and I know at anytime, I can come up with another formula, make a model out of it and make it work. It is bound to go somewhere cuz it always does. According to science, because energy is the capacity to do work, all you got to do is put your utmost energy and work gets done, beautifully even. According to math 2x2=4, double the effort, comes a precise product. According to the history, there is such a thing as pattern of events and actions, and of course, cause and effect of human decisions and behavior. All THAT was quite obvious and expected, hellow Aleta!!!

The bigger question  to ask at this time is this: how have all these made me a better person?

So, ok. My work has allowed me to explore the breadth and depth of my thought processes. It has allowed me to sustain real good conversations with my dear husband, co educator which continue to fuel my small school where children continue to learn interestingly.  It has allowed me to justify my life choices and my life projects in my home country. Pretty much learning selfishly.

So, ok. Let's try again. My life's work has allowed me to contribute great ideas to organizations, big and small. But then, dapat lang. That is what is expected of an Iskolar ng Bayan=a UP grad. All the above count from age 20-45. Pretty much learning in an altruist way.

But Im now closer to 50--about time I look for other measures of whether I have learned, or still am capable of learning. At the age of 46, this is no longer about being Iskolar ng Bayan or giving back to the country somekind of ROI, but maybe more about Being Human. A human being is not only capable of living life as a rational being forever engaged with decision making and taking responsibility for one's actions and successes, but a human being is even more capable of seeing 'the other' other than the self. The other can be some other supreme power beyond the self capable of driving other things to the same direction or another direction which could actually be better than what one perceived it to be. If that is so, then being human means capable of seeing one's limits to one's capacities--an acknowledgement of a SuperHuman out there.

And so, unknowingly, I have put that to test at my new work. I was in state of dilemma at my workplace when I had to choose between insisting on what I think was right (as a teacher and Learning Coordinator at that) and my right (as a parent). But then came a realization--why not choose to do otherwise since all my life, I have chosen to insist and I got my way and end up with the right results. What if I let things go, will I still get my way? Will things fall in its proper place (or a much better place) without me acting on it because there is 'the other' who will act on it at the right time? Does that make me passive, a non committal human being? Or does that even say I have in fact consistently become proactive and committed to my work  and therefore have always done my part and so let go, to let others do theirs?

And aside from letting go and believing that 'the other' will make things happen, why not also care for my thoughts instead of over caring about the results? Why not rethink the matter from the point of view of the situation and  its effect to my thoughts over what it can do to others?  Who am I even to assume that others will not care enough to take action?

And why not humility=surrendering to 'the other' by acknowledging one's limits and capacities? And with that comes tolerance of others' imperfections for isn't being human never about  being perfect but acknowledging imperfections?

So, with 2 final emails to my co-ALT members, I let go. For once and finally, I put into action a co-teacher's advice which may well  benefit him more than I because after all, my job is to provide support to a fellow teacher's growth and not to always insist on standards of action or teacher expectations= payback time for the length of time I was given in my career to grow and learn. For the record, I, Aleta, conceded and therefore for once thought, what will be, will be and that Being Human may possibly be all about caring for one's thoughts, humility and tolerance, and letting go or letting God.

3 lessons= 1 new formula....we shall see then. This is now what will become of me over and above what will happen to who cares about that. Will learning all these and at this age, make me more Human as can be? Am I even still capable of learning all these?

And if in fact I will be able to learn these from age 46-50, what else is there between 51-60? How shall I  be able to define what Being Human is at that point in time?

And what has all these got to do with the resurrection of Christ? Will I be even able to reconcile all these?

His Time and Not Mine Yet

I finally saw him...cold dead and all.

When I first heard the news, of course I was shocked. He was so young with so much promise for himself, his wife and his children. He had brothers, parents and grandparents looking forward to see his dreams fulfilled.Then the feeling of shock turned to anger. I turned to God and asked, "Why him? Why so soon? Why not me instead of him?". These are weird questions and thoughts I had. How dare me even to feel this way! Im not even the wife nor the daughter nor the mom, but that was how I really felt.

You see, if I die now and at this age, when my kids are pretty much ok and can go on living without me cuz they really are independent beings, I know I can leave them safely with my husband who is responsible enough to go on living with or without me and take good care of my kids and even my mom.

Such as it is.  I am still in this world while he no longer isn't. I still got work to do.
So I guess my anger was out of selfishness...like for the nth time-- I have always thought of myself in fact as that--too selfish and incapable of unconditional love, the one who  is a source of disappointment to others, the heart breaker, the one who can move on and not care at all.

But then lately, Im kinda seeing otherwise--I can be a good mom, on the lookout for my children's welfare; a concerned teacher always looking for a student's best side;  a program chair wanting to have her student graduate; a wife who can stop work and simply be with her husband; a co teacher watching someone else's back; a friend who can make time to care no matter what, and so perhaps, I cannot die yet and be up there in the heavens. Perhaps I need more time on earth to believe the goodness in me, the loving side of me. While Jerico has already proven so much to his loved ones and to himself, therefore it should be really fine for him to go.

This closest encounter with death I have ever experienced is somekind of reminder that at anytime, I can be in the place of the wife or the mother losing a husband or a child therefore I must remember to love my family while I still can. Or that I can be the one facing death...but it should be with no regrets.

My time isn't up just yet. I have enough accomplishments in life to be able to leave the earth, but not enough love given, not yet.

Interview with the Vampire: He-Devil

To Jerico...RIP


In my moments of boredom at the Cenlec, my brain wanders away to either daydream or observe people, using my peripheral vision.  Yes, I am really good at this. I notice neckline hairs, teeth,  ankles, you name it... different parts depending on the subject.  

Of course, who wouldn't miss the youngish MISO guys, always on guard for tech problems.  One  guy in a lavender shirt managed to hide behind me despite his height,  the other guy must be somewhere in the hallway (as I've crossed paths with him there a few times in my mam-may-i-go-out-moments), and the third guy looked like a  snobbish Vietnamese. 

The third guy was at the right place and the right time. He must be Jerico whom a  colleague of mine described to have  perfect grammar.  From my seat, I couldn't help but notice his pair of neat looking  leather shoes, enough to snap me out of my boredom. Like wow, much neater than mine. He must be really single to afford such a pair or perhaps, his mom loves him so.  

When I asked around, I learned that Jerico is the youngest among the MISO staff and maybe even the youngest faculty member at UPOU.  Check out his Google Apps site and find out why I took an interest in him.

Here,  Jerico has a funny story to tell, with his perfect grammar and wit. (i just don't know if he's wearing his pair of black shoes while doing this over email).

1. How did you end up working here at UPOU?

Well, it's a long story. Back in my college days (2000-2004), I had developed good connections with the faculty of the College of Devcom (UPLB), so the Dean became my first boss. In one of her projects, Mam Jean Saludadez was one of project team members. After I finished the project, Mam Jean took me as a graduate assistant since I just enrolled in UPOU.

Enrolling in UPOU was another story though. I enrolled for the degree. Most of what the program taught I already knew, so it was just a matter of finishing it. I wanted to go to Australian Nat'l Univ. and take their MS Comsci program kasi. The prerequisite was a BS or diploma in comsci. So DCS would fit the bill.

Anyway, back to UPOU. After 9 months of being a GA, the MISO head (Franjel) took me as an IT Researcher. I worked on that for six months as an NGW (Non-govt worker: may tax deduction but walang benefits whatsoever). Then when a casual position for an ISR III opened up in March 2007, I applied for it. That's my current job.

2. why would a young person choose to get tied down to government work...?

It's not really the prospect of being in the government that drew me here. Actually, I wanted to go to the private sector. But given the choice to take the lead in how one programs vs. the huge salaries, high profiles and the probability to get trained in foreign countries, I'd go for the former.

The fresh air of Los Baños, the proximity of the office and lower overall living costs are merely perks.

But for most, it's for the experience. Using the government as a stepping stone to develop skills is pretty common for programmers who want to be in the private sector sometime in their life.

3. Tell me more about your work here in MISO.  When I see MISO, I just equate it w/ Moodles.

Wow! Finally, someone asked. Most people just think we sit beside the phone all day, waiting for "help" calls.

Anyway, my main job is to develop web applications -- websites and similar scripts that you open in a browser. Google Apps and the Online Bookstore were some of my pet projects that went into production. It's not the physical appearance I work on though; it's the scripts running in the background. This consumes most of my time and is the hardest thing to do. Programming is basically telling something that isn't very smart what to do.

Another thing I'm expected to do is build servers -- web servers, databases, mail servers, etc. After I've built them, I have to maintain them -- regular updates, security audits. That sort of stuff. Unfortunately, these are things I can't learn in the classroom. I have my own "consultants" for this.

Still, I have more to do. I also keep the network at headquarters up. There's a cabling room near the Accounting Office that looks like two small refrigerators with 5000 snakes crawling around. They're cables for Internet, telephone and power. Seeing it for the first time is overwhelming. 

Of course, I'm also teaching this semester. CMSC D (Data Structures and Algorithms) and CMSC I (Software Engineering).

Finally, yes, we do have to answer the phone. From the basic "I lost my Internet connection" to the personal "Can you help me with my wireless home network?" to the odd "Do you know how much it costs to place a call to the Michigan?"

Well, that's a normal day at the office.

4. what's the dirtiest job you've done for UPOU? (I've cleaned toilets and scrubbed floors, slept overnight in my work places before, literally crossed the seas with a storm right behind me...it's even unpaid work!!!  like what's a "dirty job" in a MISO/ IT workplace like)

Well, the closest thing to that is I had to mop the cabling room during an aircon accident. It was Monday and most of the staff were not in the office. But that wasn't the dirty part. I had to squeeze out the water from the mop, which kind of looked like a corpse that caught fire and you put it out with an old t-shirt. With gloves it was already disgusting. I wonder what I'd call it if I wasn't able to find gloves.

The worst, although not really dirty, job experience I had here was when I was still an IT Researcher...

It was during some conference back in February 2007. It was a three-day event. The first would be spent at HQ, then the next two days at Trader's Hotel.

The first day (Thursday), was a regular day for me, with some AV Room duties (setup the microphones and sound system). At the end of the day, I was informed that we still had to set up a computer network at Trader's Hotel. It was already 5pm, so I was like "WTF?"

Anyway, I thought "Okay, maybe I'll just have to put a switch, hook up the wires, then I can go home." I was so wrong.

We got to the hotel around 7:00 pm. Believe it or not, we didn't have dinner. It was every man for himself. Luckily, the drivers found a small carinderia at the back and we had the only thing on the menu: tortang talong.

After dinner, I was anxious to set everything up. It was still early, so I thought that after hooking up everything, I'd stop by Starbucks and grab an iced mocha drink before heading to the bus station. (The drivers looked like they'd be going home really late so I thought that I'd just reimburse my expenses).

However, the night was just getting started. They informed us that we needed to go to UP Diliman and get 15 (yes 15!) computers. To make it short, we were really annoyed and I slept all the way to NCC. When we got there, we grabbed the computers and loaded them in the vehicles.

So we went back to Trader's Hotel. It was around 10pm. When I got there, one of MC's computers had a problem. It couldn't pick up any audio. Judith (MC staff) and I had to pay up a ridiculous 55 pesos from our own pockets for a measly 10 minutes of Internet access just to get the device driver from the manufacturer's website. Whatever. I was already in a foul mood and in such times, I really couldn't care any less.

So that was fixed. Then it took me about 10 minutes to hook up the 4 computers for public display. The other guys who helped carry all those 15 computers from NCC were outraged at the decision to put up only 4. As for me, I didn't care. I just wanted to go home. I was deprived of my iced mocha drink and every minute I spent there shaved time off my sleeping pattern.

My mood lifted when Franjel had his backpack on (that meant we had a ride), so I got ready as well. While scratching at an itch on my right cheek though, they surprised me with a horrified look. It was late, I was tired, so maybe that's why I didn't feel anything. My hand was bleeding profusely. It had gotten cut from the side of a computer case.

Oh well, at least there's a sink here. On my way to the washroom though, I met a security guard who gave me a look that said "I wonder who this bastard stabbed..." Anyway, I washed my wound and returned to the lobby. 

Before leaving, one thing I remember was Mam Vicky telling us she felt sorry that while we had to do all the work (everyone else was just chattering and sitting comfy-comfy in the lounge), we still had to go home and return early the next day. Those who really didn't have to work were the ones given hotel rooms. Anyway, we finally got on the vehicle that would take us back to Los Banos. No iced mocha for me. It was 1:30am by the time I got back to HQ. Oh, did I mention that I still had to drive home?

Not yet done though. To get back by 6:00am (oh yeah!), we'd have to leave HQ at 4:00am. So that leaves me less than 2 hours to sleep. Wow. Tough week.

So I slept at 2:00 and woke up at 3:30. I got to the bathroom and turned on the light. I pushed the switch and the light was like the Milky Way shining in all its brilliance. Moments later, I heard a sea of urgent, but calm voices. I couldn't comprehend what they were saying though.

Then a loud voice. Something understandable. "Pahinga ka muna. Last stitch."

Huh? Stitch?

Finally the light died and I found myself lying in a hospital bed. The light was the emergency room light. The incomprehensible voices were those of the nurses. The loud voice was the doctor's.

My mom was beside me, so I asked what happened. She told me that I had a seizure attack, which basically zapped my vision and froze my limbs, causing me to hit my head somewhere. Hit it hard too. Four stitches. There is a scar, although very faint, on my right eyebrow. Doctor did a good job stitching it.

I had to wait until the afternoon to be released from the hospital, so in the meantime I enjoyed having someone push me on a wheelchair for the first time. I had a bump on my head, but the experience was exhilarating. The guy pushing you follows your every word as if their life depended on it.

Go left. Go right. Stop here. Get me that. Wait here while I take a leak.
As for the epilogue, the saddest things were: 

1. The computers were never used. They didn't even turn one unit for the public to use.
2. The audio driver we got from the Internet (which we spent 55 pesos on) was never used. They decided on another means of audio recording, instead of the problematic computer.

However, for the record, if I had I known I'd be going home at 2:00pm instead of 9:00pm, I would've never gone. So I've learned my lesson here. Don't join activities that are vague about the details unless you're prepared to wake up in the hospital the next day with four stitches on your forehead.

5. what are your other options out there?

I'm open to work in web development and network administration. There are places I can work in the country and outside of it.


6. but why choose to do this kind of work now?

The University aims pretty high when it comes to envisioning where it wants to go. I think it's awesome to be part of the team that will make that reality. While I don't agree with everything UP wants to be, it's better than nothing. I think it looks good on paper, but in some areas, the University is "settling for what it can get".  I like that it's aiming high, but sometimes, I don't think it's high enough. Besides, I also want to be in a high performance environment.

7. How else can MISO be a better MISO in the future? What will it take for that to happen?

I think MISO can be better if we run like a corporate IT office. Reach for industry standards and have some sort of mentoring in the organization. We realize that fresh grads don't know a lot of things, but if we can teach them what we know, it will go a long way in helping the organization to be better. Management needs to see this, because a mediocre course delivery infrastructure paired with a good curriculum is still mediocre. No amount of frantic phone calls or emails will solve a problem created by poor investment of resources (especially manpower). We realize that the University wants to reach out, but to put five part-time employees (MISO and MC - we have other work, thus part-time) to manage an IT infrastructure supporting 3000 users is a big joke.

8.  Does your work in MISO in  a way contribute to your being a better teacher at DCS? In what ways?

Eyes which have seen real-world situations help a bit. I can at least tell them some things they should expect. Still, I think I'll find out some more as I go through this sem. I've just been an FIC for barely a month.

9. So what do you do when you're not busy w/ MISO work?

1. I go to the spa! After a tough week, it seems worth it after you've had smooth, hot stones brush away back pains. Plus, the aroma of the scented oils makes you want to forget that you can't sleep there overnight.

2. I go hiking. Usually sa Mt. Makiling. I just walk a couple of meters from our door and I'm already in the forest. I've been exploring one side of one of Mt. Makiling's valleys lately. No trails, just my markers. It's fun to go out and just get lost in the woods. Occasionally there are snakes, but if you live in a forest, snakes aren't exactly strangers. Of course, there's the usual owls, hawks, racoons and fish. I saw a rabbit once, but I don't know if it was domesticated or not.

3. I shoot. Family trips, reunions, public events, UPOU events. My recent obsession is macro photography (shooting up close). I've used a point and shoot camera for some time now, but I think it's time to upgrade to a DSLR. I'm going to get one this month.

4. I buy something. Usually I buy computer parts, price be damned. Thankfully, the other thing I splurge on is cheaper: food. My friends say I can eat like a pig. What annoys them is that it does not reflect on my body mass. Whatever I gain during dinner is gone by breakfast.

5. I play with my dogs. I have three dogs. One is a 6-year-old pit bull. Very smart, very loyal and pulls like tugboat. Her name's Mitch. The two other dogs aren't pits, but at least they're smart enough to escape from anything save for a welded cage. The older one (about 14 months old) is named Yanna and the younger one, my mom named Buboy (after the character in the Dyesebel TV series). They each have their own dog house which I either built or bought. I hate it when we have to go on vacation though, since we're gone for like 4-5 days and nobody's home to take care of them. Although at the last minute, we always find someone who can go over, feed them and clean up their mess. 

There you go. Had fun? Now if only I can ask him to show me his shoes for one last time so I can smell it,  a habit of mine whenever I window shop for expensive shoes. By the way, his pair  is a Rockport!

Reposted from: UPOU Community Site, Nov 2008

The Light...the Light...I see the Light!

Like some AHA moment, I finally see the light.

I am here to the rescue of my Hist 11.
The Imperial Japan unit was kinda so so...but it was a good time for me to reflect on 2Do's for my last unit. My ATL's= essay writing for Paper 2, and this time it's kinda swak to how we have started Unit 3 on China 1912 onwards.

The last unit on Imperial Japan was a good chance for students to look at their essay responses and peer review each others' works. They realized that they have much to learn from each others' written works.  It was also a good time to break in the IB format for their IA=Histo Investigation which in due time we need to start thinking about.

After my mtg with DP Coord, I came to realize that all the above small steps made sense. I need to remind myself however that we do not have the luxury of time, therefore I need to set things way in advance at ManageBac. This will leave us time to review for the final exam--Paper 2 to cover questions from Unit 1, 2 and 3.

Now for this Unit 3 (last unit), my targets:
-tighten their essay writing through essay exam response tips
-make use of IB materials to help them through essay writing
-brainstorm and plan for the IA
-do more OPVL exercises

There you go....whew!!!

A Chance @Something

I have a record of working in 3 schools which a parent fondly labelled as 'pasadya'.  The term we use at Beacon Academy=boutique schools.   This however I find rather interesting because that means you can actually do what you can make out of it=a good chance to take a stab at things, craft something new or even different, scrap it if doesn't work then have another go. A good model can come out of it which we may continue to build as one solid contribution to our godforsaken Philippine educational system!!!

Of course, I had to figure out what the heck the LC job is. I thought then  I was coming in as Learning Support=LC, only to find out I ended up in a meeting with all the coordinators on my first day at TBA. Then there's this man in white talking about the bus and the right people. Hmmm....I'll take this ride then.

Oh boy, what a ride! Pero sige lang...

What else is there to do when you are 46 years old, a teacher of sorts who has been there, done this and that, personal investments included...and yes have done it 3x as hard as any normal person.  Come September these are what I have set myself to do:

-assist DoF in program development initiatives 

-monitor teaching at the classroom level in order to provide concrete suggestions for program dev't, teacher growth and success

-set up systems of work of the new LSDP and  monitor students with learning support requirements

-plan, coordinate and implement in service professional development sessions specific to teaching and learning

-create spaces for committee work towards meaningful teacher growth and involvement 

The first attempt to do the above upon the orders of HOS resulted to this:

-facilitate  and coordinate teacher evaluation 

Obviously, I am in this business of guiding you through the teacher evaluation process which I see as a chance for you to  look at your practice--not for me, nor the institution, but for you, THE teacher+lifelong learner+professional. I'd like to help you capture the best and worst of your teaching  in order for you to go on this quest and reflect on ways  to become better than where you are now.

For the very few who have given me that chance to know them, exchange ideas with them, observe them, this is how I am seeing you... 

There is one teacher, who perhaps is the strongest of them all. She has withstood the test of time and gut and  she is still standing. She mentioned that she has tried everything she was told to do. And yet she feels it isn't enough. What she does not see is that she can really become great at working with students individually and see them as 'cases' to become a specialist in her field. Perhaps all she needs is protected  time to step back, reflect on her practice and see how else she can address the needs of her students. She has been doing that anyway, but why not formalize it as a real job item the school needs.

I see another teacher who described herself as 'pasaway'.  She seems quite unforgiving to herself and admittedly, a perfectionist.  There are days she really looks busy and stressed out. But in her, I see the young teacher that I was--uncertain but trying my damned best to make things work. What I love about her is this: I am an impressed parent 2x during my PTC. She is able to respond to questions and that she truly knows my daughter for the language learner that  she is  and  not a mere summative score in her gradebook.

Another one has been here for quite some time. Her students are practically relaxed with her and yet she manages to hold her class together for important points, with an affirming tone and students truly engage in discussions--all because these allow them to directly understand who they are through her subject.

I had a glimpse of this teacher--through a worksheet she made by hand. Who does that these days! There were drawings, again, by hand---interesting. What goes on her mind whenever she sits at her place in the FacLounge to plan her lessons? Will she ever let me in her classroom space to see how she does her magic while at work with students?

And of course, who can overlook the seasoned one around--too bad she will never be my daughter's teacher. She is one quick to discern both strength and weaknesses   and uphold standards of work for that is what it means to be in an international school. Imagine the kind of critical thinking that goes in her class. Or how would I fair as a student in her class? Will I be able to perform in the manner she expects me to be? 

Then of course, how about the male teachers around.  This one has a very clear agenda in mind which he sets at the start of the class. To him it is also evident that a lecture is a lecture, a report is a report, no other way to deliver the goods but through pressing questions and engaging discussions. Behind all these is a genuine concern to connect with students as real people and get to know them for who they are. Can I make him change his mind and stay a bit longer?

Who can miss this teacher who writes wonderfully! Have you ever stopped to notice his comments on the advisory notes--he sees his individual students through the works they come up with. He defines them through the work they turn in, but to capture that in how many words is what amazes me. I'm glad enough to have seen his installations (+wifey+kids) up, close and personal!

Last but not the least,  is the teacher I can never forget for he was the one who 'broke me into' the LC job. The exchange I find quite gripping and up to this day, Im not quite sure whether I should have handled it in the manner I did. He can stand and deliver, sustain an engaging discussion for about an hour or so (voice power unwavering) and patiently come up with worksheets to address individual needs.  He will do just as good once he occupies  a leadership position.

I have yet to come to know the rest of you, there's still so much to learn about you as teachers. But with my LC job,   I'd have to shed off my co-teacher identity sometimes in order to get things done:

For program dev't concerns, Id have  to challenge you a bit with questions: why do you do this? what is the purpose? how do you know it's working? what else can you do or try? are you willing to try? so it doesn't work, tell me why? I will throw ideas from nowhere because I'd like to  see how you are viewing your subject matter in relation to the  program we have to define with the DoF. This is also my way to see program possibilities and define PD sessions we can do together. I tap another expert or I tap the expert in you to share and engage...this about your professional growth.

For teaching monitoring concerns,   I  need to examine your teaching practice from a different angle so that I can bring to light areas of strengths and areas for improvement which I can only communicate in a straightforward manner as we sit together. Best to get it straight from me than beat around the bush.  And as I speak, you are by all means enjoined deal with the matter directly.  If you cannot take that, rely on your peers to observe and help you see what needs to be seen.  Or consider student feedback, to be able to reflect on others' perspective of your teaching, reflect on your current practice and write, write, write about it.

I am one to request documentation of this and that or more as evidence of your self reflection so that by the time we look at your portfolio we know how else to capture your ongoing practice. Again, this is for you as part of your teacher evaluation.

And yes, I will patiently wait for the time to see you online, learning and embracing technology, not really to determine your lives, but to make powerful use of techtools to learn and collaborate.

So, shall we give THIS a chance? I hope so....

Diego + Verm= BIOMODD in my Brain

Reposting fr 2009

http://www.biomodd.net/lba2/updates/blog/diegovermbiomoddinmybrain

My Session 1: Artificial Life Forms

The first time I worked closely with Diego was in last year's Cultural Committee for the Sunduan 2008 of UP Open Universtiy. He really is a wonder boy. I honestly told him that I hope my children will grow up to be just like him: brilliant, tech savvy, caring and healthy. I find him to be a global Pinoy in the real sense of the word. I also admire the fact that he is gay: people who have a great capacity to be themselves despite the odds. They plunge themselves into the Arts and have the benefit of getting into all kinds of pants! Getting to know Diego through conversations about UPOU, life and love was a good peek into his brain and how he thinks. He would almost always expound on an idea by drawing from theories out there and fit it in beautifully through our exchanges ( all these as we fondly talk about our common topic of interest: xxx). 

I learned that Diego was fortunate enough to be schooled abroad, not just any school but an IBO school, which fostered intercultural understanding and respect through a rigorous interdisciplinary, inquiry driven curriculum. Diego's gifts must have been honed well in an international school of that caliber. He does demonstrate attitudes of responsibility, tolerance, compassion and care ...all of which are part and parcel of student profiles and learning outcomes advocated by the IBO schools. 

It wasn't a surprise that Diego worked with equally brilliant individuals from around the world. So the first time he mentioned something about Vermeulen (whom I fondly call "Verm" in my brain but say Angelo F2F). I just got kinda curious: http://www.angelovermeulen.net/ Uhmmm, good looking guy but so what? Interdisciplines + Verm. Interesting find as these are adults working collaboratively, perhaps products of schools such as IBO. Their works show evidence of criss crossing boundaries of disciplines. Imagine that: art + science + technology +ecology. What an interesting blend of perspectives and expertise! Moreso, what of the collaborative processes in the midst of all these.

My experience with interdisciplinary curriculum and integration is only at the basic education level in progressive schools I have worked with. My understanding of this educational idea evolved from my interest in doing Social Studies differently for school children. It all the more deepened as I was able to work in an IBO school in the Philippines for six years before getting into UP Open U. Alongside doing work for UPOU, I run a small school where I managed to transplant all these curriculum ideas from lessons learned over the years. Throughout my classroom practice and research, I have observed that programs grounded on these ideas genuinely work at the grade school level but I've always wondered how it can happen in a tertiary level class. This has also been a cause for concern as a parent-teacher-school owner. I need to make sure that my current investments with my school children will not be put to waste in some kind of traditional tertiary level institution. Working with UP Open University gave me a little hope that it will indeed be an  institution of progressive and dynamic teachers who can accommodate, if not model these types of thinking and doing among students.

Hence when Diego opened invitations to attend a course set up by UPOU and the Bio Modd project, I grabbed the chance to actually see Diego at work...for how does a beautifully blended and interdisciplinary-brained person work and teach?

Consciously, when Diego was lecturing, I was wearing 2 kinds of thinking caps: that of a student and that of a teacher: a teacher’s cap to cull and outline the flow of ideas and discussions in my brain, and a student ‘s cap to think and engage with the rest of the group. There we were one afternoon at Diego’s cozy apartment: Sarah, Vanni, Julius, Habs, Be-an, Leo and I. I was pretty excited to learn anything scientific. or artistic and anything around it or beyond. Diego allowed us to state our purposes: I came out of sheer curiosity and the will to be inspired. I was curious about the group process and the manner through which Diego will facilitate this through a merging of ideas. Of course I didn't admit that I was a Diego fan. 

Diego started with reviewing major concepts drawn from science and earlier lectures which tackle few issues concerning life vs. sentience vs intelligence. Apparently these were discussed I think in one of the earlier sessions with Verm: augmentation, simulation, mimicry, substitution, extraction, description. Once in while he would draw ideas from the group but mostly he allowed us to journey with him through ideas and thoughts pertaining to the emergence of life where we got a chance to review a few science theories and concepts related to the features of life. What I find amazing was how he used these as springboard, translate these into something else through samples from art and technology. He really is an instinctive teacher--teaching from perhaps the best way he was taught. There I was with my brain following all these in spirals. How I love thinking in spirals and the challenge of making all sorts of connections in  moments of disequilibrium and uncertainty.

Then all of sudden Diego landed us into thinking about programming: when simple rules are laid out, we can actually mimick or simulate life in other forms: whether through 3D art, computer graphics and gaming! Woooonnnderful...lIke tadddaaaah, a bulb lights up my brain. What a fix! Some kind of wasabe through my nose up to my brain. Ooooohhhhhhh.

Of course, on the side I sketched/ scribbled a moving image of Diego in my brain, doing this lecture in his own special way. In between writing on th whiteboard and pressing on his laptop keys, he'd hum sweet sounding tunes. He would pause and pretend to accommodate our ideas but gently point out which ones are worth pursuing. I remember that he even laid out one essential rule: no stupid answers. He managed to pull a lecture which was relaxed yet substantive (at least to me).

Whew! Can Diego live and teach longer at UPOU so my children can learn from him?

I’m back on the ground as a student with these questions:  What I'd like to find out in the end: How will the local culture and student ideas blend and contribute to the totalilty of the Biomodd installation which can perhaps represent a bit of who we are? How will the collaboration be like? How will Biomodd Philippines be similar to/different from previous versions Biomodd?

ENERGY= [Greater] Capacity 2Do Work

Reposting fr 2009

http://www.biomodd.net/lba2/updates/blog/energygreatercapacitytodowork

I was trying to adjust my brain a bit as last night, our teacher, this Librero was some kind of wishgiver as he played my faves with the UPOU band. But since I know this guy a bit and I heart him as a reliable colleague/ community site bud,  it wasn't hard for me to just be there as a student.

AFDL is just as gifted and blended-brained like  into Diego. Earlier the Biomodd project we were exchanging about  how he will fit in with the team.  I was confident his brains would fit but I wondered about his unassuming ways.  He himself admittedly labels himself as a 'Syano' (=probinsyano=provincial).   He was fondly christened "King" by his followers  for a reason. And this I see: that students can easily relate with him and I, as UP faculty with zero knowledge on  Gaming and with a bits of  grade schoolish  Science came to class  assured that this   teacher's height will not intimidate me for sure! But his beauty, oh well, such as it is. That he can't help and besides I'm quite content with my looks.

Librero's talk on alternative sources of energy +issues related was  sufficient to keep my tired body/brain going. Our teacher was able to draw from his obvious area of expertise and personal knowledge. He delivered it in some kind of informative storytelling. I was able to clarify the basic content I needed for me to discern this: my school kids now have the perfect hooks for a third science driven inquiry learning project:
    What's  on Earth?!?
    - an inquiry into the earth's resources,
    - how these generate energy 

    - and how we can use these wisely. 

I'm seeing threads in my school's  learning projects--it is definitely Science... way to go!

Librero's  style is simple as he was getting things across by reassuring us that we do know something and it's his job to clarify a few things, with the goal of having a common  perspective: How does energy  fit into  Biomodd ?

Of course I couldn't think like a scientist even after that interesting video  he allowed us to view (and I got a copy for free!) The group talked about heat and how it can be generated and maximized as part of the installation. My mind was somewhere else, though--I was trying to recall Prof. Sol Hidalgo's (UPOU colleague) very own  "kinetic molecular theory of learning"
This is how I understood it: that learning among a group of adults can  be energized and  maximized in some kind of chemical-molecular manner.

And this is how I was translating her theory to  Biomodd:
It's a fact. My classmates and I can never  get rid ourselves of this  Biomodd talk.
It clearly is in our system. It has been a source of inspiration to most --some kind of stored energy to be "kineticized"  every time people get into the lab and do work--all these exchanges in our course generate energy--some kind of growing capacity to do work. Work for what and work for whom? Obviously now it has come to a point where it just has to move forward in ways the core didn't predict at all from the start.

But the greater challenge is this:  the course has ended and where do we take it from here?
 

My mind was back to the group as now they were  concerned about the purposes of Biomodd and some kind of public statement it seeks to get across. This is what I tried to communicate, to some extent:  that Biomodd does not necessarily have to present itself as an art piece meant to issue a single public statement.  To my mind, artists may have specific purposes for their art which will not necessarily come across to its viewers. These purposes may even change over time. In the same way,  viewers of the art piece will  have their  own  personal take at  it. It may provoke an unexpected reaction. Personal meanings may sink in to some a bit much later. It may be even nothing to others. There is however one thing we can try to do as I  see Biomodd as a means for people, most of all children to wonder about, to ask questions, to raise eyebrows--just that. The fact that something of this scale shall be displayed at our National Museum is enough to awaken us in different ways. 

Hence, one aspect  we do have the benefit of showing is this: the people/ process behind the piece-- What's the source energy which propelled the team to get to where they are now? How was this energy utillized in different ways? What energy remains beyond all these? What energy can this installation pass on to the Filipino youth?

The last session of the course has come to an end. Whether we are a renewable remains to be seen or perhaps unseen as individually we are like molecules  redefining our identities as we go back to our usual lives. Beyond Biomodd, I ask:  will each of us have renewed energy--a greater capacity to do work and love every bit of ourselves  and others than before? 

A Short Personal History of my Ever 1st DP HISTORY 11

I started feeling a bit luckier than the others since for one I only have 3 students and  I have a lesser teaching load since a bigger part of my brains should be doing LC work which I foresaw to be kicking in start of 2^nd Q.  Then of course Unit 1 topic on Stalin’s Russia and Hitler’s Germany--it was interesting enough for me and I have at least background knowledge about it. Luckier me that I inherited the ever reliable polidong Unit plans of Ms Salvan who happens to be the best DP teacher according to DP Coord.

What I needed to know AND DO is  how to balance doing these: conceptual teaching vs essential content delivery vs  a bit of inquiry vs historiography=source analysis & historical investigation (whatever that means). Most importantly, I needed to OWN the experience of being a first time World History teacher. 

Sabehen na nateng nakapagturo na ko ng Kasaysayan, subalit saan? Sa UPOU=Phil Hist na pinakapangit kong eksperimento bilang guro sa isang unibersidad. Sa Builders, konsepto ng chronology, time periods, form and function, change over time ang mga nagawa ko subalit ang nilalaman ay di ganeto ka tende tulad nang nilalaman ng World Hist.

But then, being the oldie teacher that I am,  I usually set mediocre expectations (pwede na mode) for my first sy because to my mind, the first year in any kind of school setting is about making all the mistakes. What mattered most is for me to be able to see these mistakes right on and still make time to do something about it within the schoolyear at least.  But being a more experienced teacher, I expect myself to draw from my wealth of PCK and easily bounce back so that I meet my students at least halfway.=ergo I don’t waste their time. This is owe them and my ego (hellow, ang tanda ko na kasing guro).

Freedoms

Well there isn’t much wiggle room, really. The plans were handed down and I was expected to accept it and teach it…like some UP course outline/ syllabus already ironed out by prior experts and department heads. Who am I even to question that? It was the safest mode to operate  while I grapple with making sense of my LC. But then later on I discovered, there were items in the  unit plan itself which I did not completely agree with. I chose ideology to be the key concept during the first unit and this second unit’s statement of central idea I find too lame. What I did was to look into other curriculum sources online about Imperial Japan.  So my compromise is this: I’ll stick to at least ¼ of the initial plan. 

Obviously, my plans were ever changing from the original and remains to be a work in progress at Managebac and never a hardcopy version for submission to DP Coord.  Beyond figuring out the content was the bigger question of how  or ( will I)  use the content to  prepare for Paper 1.

Ang sagot: walang kamatayang OPVL=hope-PEEVE-HeLL…walang kamatayang pagsasanay sa paghahanda sa eksam. Bweset. Pet peeve ko kase ang baduy na explicit skills instruction at ang pag-check ng OPVL ay tipong aaralin ko pa kase may iisang paraan sinasabi ang IB.

Is this about resisting change=learning or just resistance to IB?

Challenges

It turns out my PCK has more PK. There was a lot of CK to contend with—too many sources to read and I can’t quite keep up. Bote nalang may DP Course Companion and  IB-DP packaged textbooks at sa ganito rin pala kumikita ang DP, haha. I was able to cope with the first Unit, being at least 2 steps ahead of the students when it comes to doing engaged reading and seeing content conceptually, devising work to address needs of my students.

Then came unit 2=total 0 knowledge of Imperial Japan.  I kinda panicked since I should be able to intergrate exam preps for Paper 1=ang dakilang subalit pinakboring na exam na nakita ko sa buong buhay ko.  It was like the purpose of doing the teaching and learning relied heavily on skills development and application of what to IB was necessary and it can only be done in the manner IB says so!!!! To what extent can one be flexible, and open ended and to what extent will teaching be test /IA driven. And I think at DP, it was the IA’s which are driving the teaching and learning more than ever.

What about my sense of ownership over what I think must be taught and learned? What about the student’s  view about their own questions and how these can be addressed? How to convince myself that a big part of what I should be skills instruction=ATL’s vs inquiry and project based learning?

Aleta, isang munting paalala: This is not about you..this is about teaching the subject matter. Get that into your thick head= ergo tolerance, obedience, stick to the mold.

But then my teaching history hardly show proof of sticking to the mold.

Future Directions
I think I just need to relax a bit and seek help from the experts: MM and CS--the most seasoned teachers of TBA. It is good enough that I have a wealth of PK, a PCK of Social Studies and Inquiry Teaching therefore definitely this will be the basis of growth of PCK, the IB kind.

The new unit on China should be interesting at least. Again, rely on the fact that "Interest" drives learning and instruction, according to Dewey and Pestalozzi.

Rules of Engagement II version 2015

1. Thou shall not take more than what is given.
2. Thou shall wait.
3. Thou shall wait more.
4. Thou shall not interrupt.
5. Thou shall always try.
6. Thou shall accept delightful things.
7. Thou shall ask for help and care for thyself.
8. Thou shall accept defeat and try again.
9. Thou shall learn to move on.
10. Thou shall see God in little things.