Saturday, November 20, 2010

Left of Center

Finally, I've heard honest feedback from Mam Jean re my EDDE 206 work.
But I wasn't even expecting to get words of advice for my theses.
Just when I was about to give up on my cause (Progressive Schools+Social Studies+ Curriculum Design/Dev't)and get into a different topic....

It seems like all the support systems are in place for me to be able to do this--
I have collegeaues who believe that this is worth it and I know I can count on them anytime for research advice. I have children who are self supporting alongside a free range mother hen such as I who seems to be up and about. I have a Teacher Vic who does more than his share of parenting and has tolerated me all this time and given me the space to be caught up in all these. I am lucky enough to afford a UP education. I have students and co teachers who are self propelling. I have a job that can allow me to do all these. There is no standing obstacle except I, MYSELF, ME=JULIET! Self doubt has been my mortal sin-mortal enemy all this time.

It took an EDDE 206+ Jean + Primo to do make me see that.

Noting down here points to remember and perhaps to live by:
-start from where you are
-get the side of my advisers
-consider their view
-let my contribution to the field be the research methodology
and theoretical frame through which I can achieve this research


In the midst of my exchanges with Jean, and overhearing Primo saying this and that, I go (trying to recall my exact words...) "bakit sa tingin mo magagawa ko yan"?
Primo goes "kase left of center ka e". How can he have captured that side of me I've taken for granted. All this time, I've never exactly did what most usually do.
I've always been a step away from the path or shall I say veered away from the common path to explore a trail that's nowhere to be found.

I am meant to be here, at this time for a reason and I've simply failed to see that God's hand has been there. And maybe if Dave were here, he would say "causes and conditions". My attachment=self doubt=self at the center of the self doubt!!!

So Aleta, just keep at it...carry on.

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